Posted in blogathon 2016, dream

The one where I sing a Hindi song live

Group of aunties busy discussing their latest possessions – sarees and gold, another group checking if they can find any suitable girl/boy for their log distant relatives’ boy/girl. Another set simply asking “when is the good news”

Mapillai- my brother sitting with his daavu with a plastered smile..I can see his jaw paining ,I can feel it  .

Myself – So glad that atlast I am in a phase where no aunties can ask me any awkward questions for now. B’coz marriage -check , baby -check , second baby – there is still time now for that question. So in short I am simply having fun.

In middle of all the sounds – light music, laughter and others I hear my name. Someone calling me.Someone calling me loud now. I turn and there stands my super singer (not aitel one) cousin. He is calling me somewhere. I ask where unable to understand what he is saying in the crowd. He pulls me towards the dias. He says “SS you try please you try no. ” . Me “Whattttt, noo way, you want ppl to run?” . Him “hey I know you. I have heard you many times, plus its just S’s wedding. You will never get a chance, just try” . Me ” Ayyo but I know only few songs da” .

Him ” That and all taken care of, sing what you sung that day when we all met, the troop knows that song, so they are ready” . Me ” Dei yen da..what did I do to you” . He simply pushes me.

I am near the mic. I can see group 1 , 2 and 3 of aunties turning their heads towards me. I see a smirk in their faces. Now they have a topic to talk about for next 50 weddings or worse till light music lasts in this world. I am sweating. The musician asks if I am ready. I nod yes thinking “never”.

I start slowly , close my eyes trying to imagine that I am all alone and start singing. I lose the track of time. My eyes are wet . I am tilting 45 degrees , 90 degrees..135 degrees..I am about to fall..mmmmmm..I finish my first stanza.. I open my moist eyes wondering if the wedding is still happening, afraid that my brother will curse me his entire life. But people are there still..I spot B, he is smiling actually smiling.. my cousin that idiot clapping.. all aunties slowly starting to clap, smiles starting to form in everyones face.. slowly..slowly I am feeling high..flying actually..

In all this tension I realize that my bladder has become full..another stanza coming up..I start opening my mouth..KICKKK

Volt must have kicked real hard … I wake up from my most realistic dream ever..Its all so dark.. Time is 2:47 AM.Oh God,it was all a dream? I was not singing???oh noo..

The only thing that was “real” was that my bladder was actually full and so the kick was 10 times worse. hmmppffff

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Posted in Blogathon 2015, dream, Me

mmmmhmmm…

mmmmmm.hummmmmmm…mmmmmmmm..mmmmm
That was me humming a recent favourite song although eating a delicious cake would also have produced same kind of sound from me Smiley

MY Amma thinks that I am a good singer,that if I practise more I will become better. I am not a good singer and all but you know mothers!Smiley
I sing ok – ok. Considering the chances of you asking me to sing to test my voice quality are very slim, I will just say that I am a good singer SmileySmiley

When I was pregnant or even before that I used to prepare mentally , how I will sing to my baby everyday, how the baby returns a soft beautiful smile on hearing my sweet,honey dripping voice,how everyone in my house just stop what they were doing and look at me with a peaceful smile as soon as I start singing (thooliyilae aada vanda…raasathi unna kanaatha nenju…), in short how the world turns into a beautiful place as soon as my song spreads in the air…hummmmmmmmmmmmm

But but there was just one problem.I was really really bad in lyrics. Even in my mother tongue I couldnot remember the lyrics.After two lines it will all be my own lyrics (horrible lyrics) but just for my own safety I fill it with mmmmms and hmmmmmss.Anyway I kept dreaming of singing beautiful songs to my baby and the fact that I sing almost like shreya ghoshal in my dreams did not help me much to take a peek into reality. I tried hard to memorize “manikkam katti” lyrics and kept on listening to Unnikrishnan in loop, also some kannan and bharathiyar songs were memorized.

Volt arrived and the initial days went in a blur. SInce those days were blurred I don’t really know what happened but volt developed her own playlist and all my kannan and bharathi songs never feautured in that list.I surrendered and started singing only the songs which volt liked (B..I..NGO..B..I..NGO..) and it continues till date..But the lyrics problem is still there (May had a crocodile…crocodile…crocodile)

That does not stop me from dreaming.I am still a “shreya shoshal” in my dream and “if” someday volt develops interest in singing we will sing songs together, record it and send it to you all 😀 Smiley Smiley

p.s. If you get that recording and wonder which voice is mine ..pay attention to the lyrics 😉

Credits : Smileys from freesmileys.org

Posted in Books, dream

Random Ranganayaki – 6

Sometime back in this post I had written about a strange dream

Weird dreams are continuing. Once a puppy was following me wherever I went , even to the places where it cannot enter, it followed me magically. I arrange for a meeting with a bus full of strangers to find out how to stop that puppy. Before we could make the decision I woke up.

Actually I left out the climax of this dream. Reason was , I was pregnant then and I had not announced it here plus that part was really weird so I skipped it. This is what happened after that meeting in the bus. I gave birth to a puppy. Needless to say that I woke up in a shock.

 

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With Volt sometimes I have all the patience in the world but sometimes I feel very confused if I can handle her well . Especially when she is cranky I have like one hundred doubts. I don’t know how my parents raised me without any help from grandparents. Really I don’t know.

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I wanted to write something here but decided to make it as a separate post titled “Realisations after Volt” as there are too many.

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I have started to walk, these days mornings are so pleasant with birds chirping and trees so green I am loving it. I don’t listen to songs while walking as the cuckoo in our garden sings so loud and beautiful 🙂 Don’t want to miss that.

Can’t wait to take volt outside and make her hear all these songs 🙂

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Now that I wake up multiple times during night I should be remembering all my dreams but I am not able to recall any of it in the morning. Hmmppff.

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Volt has a brand new cousin sister now 🙂 Yep She is Akka now 😀

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I am reading Ghost-in-law series and A Miss Fortune Mystery series by Jana DeLeon. Its very light and fun and I am loving it.

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I wanted to write about Volt and her activities here but then dropped the idea . My chithi came today and she was telling me that we will soon forget these things which seem to be so big now and later when we see another baby we try to recall if we faced that too. That made me think and I have decided to write about Volt and her activities.

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OK..That is all now. See you..Take care..

Posted in dream, Thoughts of a confused child

Another strange dream

When I have strange,weird dreams and tell my mom about that she always finds a connection between any recent activity in real and the dream , even if I dream about using a crane to dig a huge hole underground to park my car! But yesterday I had a very different dream and I could not find out any connection . There were lot of people, people from my school, college, relatives – none of them I am close with. They are just some people I know , no close interaction. And there were people and things from very different timelines.

Around 2 Am I woke up to check volt and realized I had a very different dream. It started like this. I am in a class room with a girl from my 10th standard class whom I have not seen/spoken to since 10th standard.We stare at each other for sometime and suddenly I get up and go to a room, the room resembles one of my relatives’ place. I am trying to assemble a breast pump there. Then one of my distant relative whom I have seen only once in reality comes and asks me to explain how the pump works. I explain everything and he goes away. I realize I am late for a class and my college HOD is taking that class.

Since I am late I decide to skip the class and stay back, when I try to pack the breast pump in its box, I find the piston missing. The relative has stolen it I think. Then again I decide to goto class anyway and when I ask the professor if I can come in , the professor now  is Actor/comedian Sandhanam! He asks me to stay outside and  laughs about it as if its a joke. I stand confused when I feel a hand on my back.When I turn its one of my best friend(the only person in this dream whom I am close with, talked to recently in reality). Then many girls from my college come running and they are all hugging her and I am just standing watching.

I know the dream continued after that but I am not able to recall now. When I was putting volt back to sleep at 2, I purposefully tried to recollect the dream so that I will remember in the morning.I managed to remember 75% of it I think.

What is surprising me is the people and things in this dream, shuttling between different times and majority of the people in this dream are almost forgotten in reality. Why did my brain pick up random things and connected them ? What triggered all these?

Human brain is a mystery!

Posted in Blogathon 2014, daily daily, dream

Random Ranganayaki -3

-> I am really bad in consoling others. When my friends tell me how bad their situation is or their problem , I manage a bit if I am talking in person. But strangely if it is on chat, I keep saying that ‘soon  things will be OK, something better is coming up’ . I feel guilty that I am not helping them much.

-> I will be perfectly myself when I am with B or amma. I never even think what I am doing in front of them. B mostly laughs or gives me few kicks when I act silly -ya ya real ones 🙂 The fact that he enjoys makes me do even more funny stuff. My amma is exactly the same with me. She talks and does funny stuff and we both laugh,The fact that I am enjoying her antics makes her more happy.

->My tone changes when I am talking to close ones. People say it sounds  very kiddish 🙂 , something I don’t do intentionally,don’t even notice.

-> Colleagues in office have heard my stomach growling in hunger. 

-> Most of the times just telling my problem to either B or amma makes me feel relaxed. They don’t even have to give me a solution.

-> My amma’s gas stove which is years older than mine looks much cleaner and shiny though I clean mine everyday.Moms!

-> Today my mom asked me to call maid and ask her to come early. I called her but she was really not well. First sentence is real and second was in my dream during afternoon nap (saturday boss).

-> I like people who smile to themselves when lost in thoughts , noticed in bus many times.

-> I want to share more random stuff but I am afraid that I will run out of ideas and need them to fill another post 🙂

Posted in crazy thoughts, dream

Friendship Request

I love elephants. If I have the place and strength I would not mind having an elephant as pet. I will not chain her/him. She can roam around and come and meet me whenever she feels like or whenever I am sad or think about her like how it happens in movies. Heroine is sad, dog/snake/elephant/goat/bull/horse/monkey comes running wipes her tears off and goes and punishes the villain (Please don’t ask me how can a snake wipe tears, watch Devar films for technical details)

I don’t want such drama. just few small dreams I have.Like I said before an occasional visit will be good enough. And while coming to see me, he/she can bring some nice fruits. I wish chocolate was a fruit.

Oh and on mondays, tuesdays, fridays and also on wednesdays and thursdays it would be awesome if he/she can drop me at my office, wave tata and pick me up 😀 😀 😀

cool-cartoon-6438756

 

 

And when he comes and visits me he can bring some of his friends. It would be nice to meet some friendly lion, tigers. Also he should be friendly (not too close, he is MY close friend) to other people in our area.

cool-cartoon-6438762

OK. I will stop. I know what you are thinking. You are searching for that note which says ” This was sitting in my draft since I was 5 years old. Finally I published it” I am sorry but I wrote it just 5 minutes back. Yes I am like that. At times I can go silly/childish to an extent that no one can imagine.

I was reading about wild life conservation. It was shocking to read about what is happening to our precious wildlife. Elephants , tigers, lions, snakes, whales are killed at alarming rates. Most of them are killed for money/ food while thousand other species are being killed just in the process of killing the targets. Many studies say that at this rate in 15 years some of the animal species can only be seen in photographs! It is disturbing, right?

I have not even finished reading the magazine but I have already started imagining stuff.Being friends with animals or birds in a dream is not new to me. I have had these dreams since childhood. In desperate attempts I would steal rice when my mom is asleep and throw away in the verandah hoping some birds will eat and accept my friendship request and then we will walk together sing together . First part happened. They came and ate happily but the friendship part, they din’t seem to remember my face that much.

This friendship with animals imagination/dream happened very frequently when I was a kid. These days it comes when I watch/read about animals.Though I dream a lot about it, in reality I am not so friendly. I am scared of all animals. I can watch them from a distance but I don’t know know how to interact. My maami, my mother they used to have pet squirrels which comes and eats out of their hands everyday. These days I hardly see any squirrel. The only thing I see in abundant is mosquito. They are not so friendly !

Many of my friends interact with animals so easily , be it a street dog or someone’s cat or a random squirrel. In few minutes they will become friends while I will be sitting at the highest place possible in their home folding both my legs close to my chest, wishing I could turn my head in full circle like an owl to keep a watch . I read articles, see pictures about how a man has a lion/bear as his close friend. Sigh! Someone teach me how to be friends with animals!

 

Posted in crazy thoughts, dream

I thought I loved Geography!!!

We were in chennai that time .My amma and my chithi had gone to attend a wedding.They left on sunday itself . I could not take a long leave, so I started on tuesday morning. Since my friends kept teasing me that I had put on lot of weight I decided to walk till the mandap. The wedding was on wednesday.

I started walking and reached some place. My subconscious mind told me that I have landed in a wrong place.There were so many people around me but I didnot understand a word they spoke. I got scared.I called my mother and chithi and asked them where they were. Their reply shocked me.

Amma: Where are you da?

Me: Amma I don’t know. It looks like..like Gujarat!

Amma: oh *worried* Why did you go there. The wedding is in Madhya Pradesh.

Me: ohhh.. Amma I think I took a wrong turn and landed up here. what shall I do now?

Amma : OK baby, You must be tired now. Go to a hotel and stay there tonight, morning you can come here.

I sat in the hotel lobby thinking about how to reach MP in the morning. In my mind I imagined India map. And I imagined it wrong. In the map Gujarat was in the MP’s place and MP was in Gujarat!!

* So in my dream I realize that my geography knowledge is so bad so so bad . It disturbs me a lot and I get scared, but the dream is not over yet. To reassure me, my real sub conscious mind sends my cousin into the dream *

Hotel room is booked  and I am so relieved to see my cousin there in the same hotel. We  talked for a long time,went to a nearby restaurant and had dinner together. The food was awesome, super awesome but it was so costly. We paid Rs. 10,000 just for food and left the restaurant.

I could not believe that I had paid 10,000 rupees for a dinner. It was too much.On the way back to our hotel room , I told my cousin,

Me: What ya.. the food is so costly here. Just for a two day trip I have spent so much money. You know what, I am going to make this trip worth for the money. Tomorrow as soon as we reach MP,first thing, I am going to Ranthambore National Park and  going to have fun!!!!

*** I wake up from my dream. Ranthambore National park in MP????? Man… How the hell did I score 85% in 10th std Geography??? With this level of knowledge I should have never passed it!!! ***

*** In the scene where I tell amma that I am in Gujarat, I remember RM’s name came up, but I don’t remember much of it ***

*** This was yesterday’s dream, writing this masterpiece down before I forget ***

*** As I am typing this, I have our own India map open in another window. I am still shocked about my Geography General knowledge you see ***

*** So people never ask me for direction, b’coz you know the truth now ***

 

Posted in crazy thoughts, dream

Randomness – II

➡ My mother saw some cooking show yesterday and she made an awesome sambhar/kozhambu today called “Aranmanai kozhambu”. It was too good but I decided to call it as “Aranmanai rasam”.

➡ The bus conductor was very nice today , he gave me the exact change without any argument.

➡ It is cold here. I decided to take out my new fancy sweater and wear it today and the sun came out early and was laughing at me. Grrr..

➡ I had a weird dream yesterday and in the sleep I decided to blog about it. But now I don’t remember anything about the dream and I am not sure if the blogging idea was part of the dream or real.

➡ I cooked a lot last weekend. I made RD’s rajma. It came out good 🙂 And then I made garlic vatha kozhambu and white sauce pasta. Thats lot for me ..Good progress !

➡ Lot of work these days and as expected my brain stopped functioning.

➡ There is one guy (X) who often visits another guy in my cubicle. This X is so tall and walks so fast that everytime when he crosses me a huge volume of cold air attacks me. I named him “the fan guy”. No I don’t have a crush on him. Its just some law of physics!!

➡ I am so lost these days. I searched for my seat in wrong floor, missed my cubicle and went somewhere else in the same floor twice.

➡ My mind is in a confused state today. ** stares at the ceiling for some time and hits publish button**

Posted in dream

I am a super hero ..

…. in my dreams :D. Yes! In most of my dreams I act like a super hero and do some heroic act. Like one time in my dream I was playing with my cousins in my grand ma’s house . We were playing throw catch and suddenly someone throws the ball away. My cousin goes to pick it up  but she gets caught by a crocodile ! (No I did not watch discovery channel that day ) . Then the super hero part of my brain gets activated and I save my cousin. 😀 :D. There are many more such dreams. But most of them I donot remember completely.

Some people say dreams are black and white. Some say it will be in colors. I see red and yellow colors often in my dreams. One time there was some snake I think , yellow colored with red spots.It was trying to catch me and I ran very fast and got into a mini bus and escaped. Again the bus was in red and yellow.

Two dreams I can never forget because there was a collision between dream and reality. One time I was sleeping and my mother was next to me. That evening we heard stories about theft n all in that area. Since we were alone we checked the house twice and then went to sleep. In my dream I am playing with my cousin in the hall.Suddenly there comes a big frog -red and yellow. We both are scared and try to run away. But the frog is too quick and in one jump it sits on my stomach. Exactly at the same moment, my mother put her hand around my waist 😯 😯  “veeeee !! ” I shouted and got up .  (If the dream had continued I would have somehow escaped from the frog ok because I am a Super Hero !  😎 ) My mother got scared ,she gave me some water and asked me what happened. She was expecting some really scary story from me but then when I told about that scary red and yellow frog she turned red with anger. I think she likes frogs 😕

Another time I was sleeping next to a window and that window has horizontal bars .In my dream my aunt is trying to open a door early in the morning.She pulls it so hard but its not opening. Then the super hero (me me me) gives an entry and without much effort grabs the handle and tries to open the door. I woke up and realized that I have been pulling the window bar !!! dream and reality mix up you see 😀

There is also one more thing about my dreams. If there is something negative happening in my dream, I wake up and then again consciously continue my dream, rewrite the climax and make it as a happy ending 😎

I have a friend who says he never had any dream !! Is that possible ?

Sweet dreams folks !

Credits :- The above cartoons were created  using toondoo.com