Whatever works! Whatever!

If you bring me a list of DON”Ts in parenting , I think I would tick most of the items as “Totally doing it”.

I don’t believe in perfect parenting,text book parenting. Not too long ago I was discussing this with Maya. I believe in “whatever works as long as its good for you and family – parenting style”. But today I feel that I am standing on the other side of the tunnel, thinking. The more I think the more I feel bad about my parenting “style”. I let her watch TV/cartoons/favourite rhymes. I feed her by showing rhymes. We read not-so-often.All of these a complete no no any parenting book/website would say.

Why am i blabbering so much today? Because Volt is refusing to eat. Its been more than a month since she stopped eating fruits/vegetables. Today its NIL not almost nil..its NIL. Since last one week even normal food is rejected, neglected ,spat down, thrown off.

I know that

1. This is a phase

2. I should not force feed

3. I am away most part of the day

4. My mother is doing a great job feeding her

5. This will change

But none of this is convincing me. Yesterday when I went home and heard that she didnot have proper food the whole day I tried force feeding her. I shouted. She cried. When I started eating I could not. I was feeling guilty. Guilty because I made her cry feeding forcefully, guilty because here I was sitting with a plate stacked with hot dosai whereas she has not eaten anything properly, guilty because I am scared may be I am doing everything wrong.”Whatever works” sounded great when everything was going as planned. I cannot say it now because I am under pressure and I don’t see it working. If I do it bad at 15 months , how will I do it right at 15 years.

ppoohh.. wait.. inside my brain I am actually shouting as I am typing..need to relax.. 2 secs..

Later I sat with her, asked her to bring her books one by one, read with her, played with her and went to sleep. God, children forget and forgive us easily. Only I am not able to forgive myself.



16 thoughts on “Whatever works! Whatever!

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  1. Dont wrry SS..as you said it is just a phase. Some times when lil one used to refuse eating..the reason was throat or stomach infection…just make sure volt is doing fine health wise..(i knw u wud hv already done that too)..
    My son has always been a cartoon/rhymes wala child..dont think too much..each one to their own.
    You are an awesome parent…and doing the job very well.

  2. I don’t think you should worry much for all the reasons that you have listed out. My brother is 15 years old, 6 foot 2 inches tall and eats less than a cat would. While mum is worried, she knows that there isn’t much she can do about it. So she tried to make things that he likes to eat whenever she can and makes sure that there is something to eat in the house at all times, just in case. He was a fussy baby and is a fussy teen now. Mum used to feel guilty, still does sometimes, but it is just a matter of knowing that you can’t do much more in certain things when it comes to your children.

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