I thought of skipping the blogathon today, felt little exhausted and also monday blues had started early. With these online classes, 50% of the work is done at home and on top of that baby Joule gives us another set of homework. Anyways I was just feeling meh by evening.
I made groundnut chutney and was having dosai with volt. Everytime a new dosai came in I stacked it on top of the one I was eating. Volt was doing the opposite, she was inserting the dosai beneath the current one. While I was trying to save my plate from baby Joule (who was trying to kick the plate with her legs at the same time snatch it with her hands- very confusing yet powerful martial arts), volt noticed this and asked me why I am doing the opposite. I told her that I liked to eat hot so the new ones went on top while she liked it cold.
There is nothing much in this conversation but instantly it put my mind at ease.
Then my mom called. On my mom’s side there is a problem. I guess their memory cells are like stack. To call one name, they have to dig out and call all the other names and finally they get the right one. For eg, to call me she will say “Visha, FV, Tharani, Indu, Seema, Chaithra, Ani..Summerscript” and to call Tharani “Visha, FV, Indu, Seema, Chaithra, Ani, Summerscript ..Tharani”
She did the same in front of Volt . Volt started laughing and started investigating about why my mom did that .
Volt: “Why did she call summerscript, Joule and then volt?” “Is it because we were sitting in that order??” (we were sitting in a circle btw)
Then we were watching super singer and Shankar Mahadevan and Hariharan were singing. My mom called volt.. Mom: See volt , how nicely they are singing Volt: mmhmm Mom: See how talented they are. volt: mmmm Mom: They have got so many awards. Volt: mmmhmm Mom: And they know so many languages… English, Hindi, Tamil, Malayalam, Marathi… Volt: Do they know NaaNaa language ? (Remember Jemnaa ?) My mom did not say a word after that.
For Republic day, we were helping volt prepare for a short speech. B wrote the speech. When she was practicing, there was a line which said that this is our 72nd Republic day.
I calculated nearly four to five times and I was so surprised that B had calculated the year wrong. I went and asked him about it.
Me: how is it 72nd Republic day?
B: Yes you have to include 1950 also
Me: Yeah but how is it 72 ..it is only 62
B: what are you saying?
Me : yes .. 1950 to 2012…
B then stops doing whatever he has been doing.. he gives a stunned look.
I still don’t realise. Volt hears everything and says ‘ Amma I was not even born in 2012, how can I give a speech? Hahaah ‘
Then it hits me.. we are in 2021.. TWENTY TWENTY ONE. I am stunned. Why did I think it was 2012? All of a sudden. It was not a momentary thing.. the whole thing took nore than ten fifteen minutes and I didn’t realise it on my own .
* where am I? Mandatory question after you wake up from fainting
If you are that unfortunate person who sleeps between two people esp. two little people, I am sure you will understand what I am going through.
The blanket roller: This person cannot keep the blanket on themselves at any cost. The moment you cover them they roll it like a pasta roller and the blanket will go under them. You cannot pull it out without waking that person up. Now who will commit that dangerous crime of waking up that little person! Though your brain disagrees the mom cells wake up and you decide to offer and share your blanket. What an Idiot! But the blanket roller has no regards. Throw any blanket on them …roll…Crumple..throw. Now you are staring at the ceiling , shivering.
The supporting beam engineer: You are on your side facing the other way, this tiny person first travels down so that their head is at your shoulder level. Remember that they are behind you. Now this supporting engineer comes very very close to you and put their head very close to your back between your shoulder blades and lock you. That’s it . You cannot turn now. To turn you have to push their head away but remember you skipped yoga classes 501 times? Your hands cannot reach all the way back between your shoulders. You are Stuck ! FOREVER !
The clockmaker: One minute their head is near your head, the next minute you are staring at their legs or worse..their butt. This goes on and on. There is no stopping.
The shawarma rotisserie: Being attacked from both sides… you know how it feels? Both the tiny ones are crowding you. You cannot roll them away or push them aside. No. You cannot take that risk of waking them up. But you are numb on one side. You want to turn , you cannot feel your right side..you crave to turn your body. That’s where the shawarma comes in. Imagine yourself as that conical shawarma in that huge rotisserie and slowly start rolling in place. No displacement..just rotation..just like that graceful shawarma on a rotisserie.. slow and steady. Thats it. Freedom!
Inspite of having all this tremendous knowledge I failed in all four scenarios last night and woke up with a sore neck and shoulders ! Sigh!
Last year was difficult for me emotionally. I had bad mood swings. I don’t how much I showed outside but internally I was a wreck. My favorite genre is mystery/horror/thrillers. But I could not read such books or watch such shows. The fear of unknown affected me. Instead I watched FRIENDS from start to end twice scene by scene back to back. I felt safe there. Secured. I knew what was going to happen next.
I typed so many things here in the last 30 means about internet trolls, about how it is unfair to criticize someone because they chose family over work/cricket , about how difficult it is to come back to work after maternity leave, the challenges you face, the FOMO, the enormous expectation the society has from a mother vs father (though sometimes unintentionally)..Lot of things..But I could not finish any of these . Just by thinking about all these I feel drained out.
These days I take a picture of what I eat so that atleast I can post some food pics end of the day if I don’t have anything else to write.
But the appam was so good in the morning that I completely forgot to capture it through the lens.
Since no pic and no idea, I have decided to write a poem..
Montevideo is the capital of Uruguay.. I am not ready for another Monday.. Night tiffin will be dose.. I have been thinking about it all day… With the postpartum hairfall everyday, My head looks like a runway… Want the weekend to replay.. This blogathon is not a child’s play.,.
I woke up with a very PMS kind of mood, irritable and agitated though it is not the time for PMS.
The period tracker app found out about my mood and wanted to jump in to help. It is a good app so I gave in.
App: “Not in good mood? we are here to help. Take this survey . This is designed by world’s best doctor ABC. It helps you to understand whats going on with you.” Me: Ok sure App: How do you feel? Me: Irritated. grrr App: Bla bla questions Me: bloo bloo answers App: Thank you for your time. To find out the result of the survey, kindly upgrade to premium account! Hey! you can cancel it anytime! Me: